"I guess times have just changed," she said.
Rewind about 30 years. Yes, that's how old I am. My mom has engrained in my mind since the day I was born that when someone does something nice for you, you respond by sending them a thank you card to let them know how much you appreciate it. No good deed should ever go unnoticed - or unthanked.
Until recently I've been pretty good about sending my thank you notes whenever the situation presented itself. It isn't always necessarily about a gift, either. If someone said something that made my day, off went a thank you card. If someone went out of their way for me or my family in any way, you guessed it - they got their thank you card in the mail a few days later.
But it was sometime last fall that I fell out of my habit. The reason? I was at lunch with some of my friends, and they started making fun of me for all those thank you notes! They said it was sweet, but basically, it was a bit much. They thought my saying thank you was enough. I went away from the lunch thinking, 'Okay, I'll save some time, some trees, and some teasing, and forego my thank you notes.'
So Christmas came. Oby, Chloe and I were spoiled. Last Christmas I had stocked up on festive thank you notes, so I had them. But I didn't fill them out. I didn't send them. Not even to my mom. *Gasp!* It actually took physical restraint to change my habit, but I managed. And then I realized that it did save a lot of time, stamps, and trees by not sending an actual thank you note. Of course everyone who gave gifts was thanked - in person.
But is that enough?
Tell me, bloggy friends, do you send thank you notes? Do you prefer saying thanks in person or over the phone? How about an email? Do you like getting thank you notes? Talk to me, Goose....
21 comments:
I think if you received a gift or something in person then a verbal thank you is good. If the person went well out of their way, then I think a thank you note is a great idea. I also think people should still be sending thank you notes after wedding, showers, or parties where you receive many gifts so you are not necessarily opening them when they are around. If you receive an item in the mail or by donation then I think it is nice ot send a thank you note, or at least a phone call. I would never make fun of someone sending thank you's...We need more people spreading cheer in the world!
Ha ha, Top Gun was one of my favorite movies growing up!
About the Thank You notes, I think they're a very sweet sentiment but it's not ever anything I've done. I say thank you in person or a phone call. With the notes I just can't ever remember to do them...I'm always very greatful though and I make sure, or try to, to let the person know how appreciated they are and how thankful I am.
I'd like to be the kind of person who sends thank you cards but_well it just never happens. Hope that's not all to disjointed for you...my mind hasn't been working at full speed this past little while.
Also, I try to reciprocate in someway. If someone does something for me I like to do something for them in return. So that it's a trade off. I like to make other people feel as good as they've made me feel.
My rule of thumb is that if it is the holidays (i.e. Christmas), and the gift-giver is present, I tell them thank you in person only. If the gift-giver is not present, I will send a thank-you card. I also send thank-you cards in response to gifts at special occasion parties (baby showers, b-day parties, etc.). However, one of the best gifts I received at my work baby showers was the request for no thank-you cards (there were nearly 40 people at the shower); I happily obliged and sent a mass thank-you email instead. ha!
I wish I did send Thank You notes. It's a great habit to have and always better to er on the side of being overly grateful I think.
That said, I am TERRIBLE about mailing anything. I've only gotten Christmas cards out once in 12 Christmases, this past year, and only because I had my blog to keep me accountable.
If a Grandparent or Great Aunt or someone of that generation gets me a gift, I really do try to get off the Thank Yous because I know they will appreciate (read expect) it and I don't want to disappoint them.
I'm all about thank you notes and it irks me when I've taken time out of my schedule to pick out a gift/deliver it/etc. and nothing is said . . .just my humble opinion though!
I always send notes and I always get teased--so now I send notes from my kids, they are only 1 and 3, but when people gets notes from the kids they think it's cute. I still send my notes, and the few people that laugh at me still get notes, and if it gives them a laugh all the better!
I think a proper Thank you is a sign of good manners. It can depend on the situation like if you open Xmas presents and thank the giver right then, no problem. I like receiving a thank you card and appreciate the one you sent me for a children's book.
Why would someone make fun of you for sending a Thank You note? I don't think people say Thank you, please, or show appreciation enough. I think any gesture of kindness should be acknowledged. And who doesn't like a surprise in the mailbox. It beats all the bills and junk. Go ahead Tara, keep on sending those Thank You notes.
i like getting thank you notes :) i have a friend who sends them ALL the time, i LOVE it! i don't send them out as much as i used to (life with kids... need i say more?) but i always feel guilty for not doing it. with that said, i never feel bad, or irritated if someone doesn't send one. i feel that's the norm, just say thank you. getting a card is not the norm and puts a smile on my face. :)
good question!
I like sending thank you notes. It doesn't always happen. At Christmas, etc. they just get a thank you in person. But for baby gifts, etc I always do cards. When Boston was born I took the cards around to the ladies who brought in meals when I took their dishes back.... stuff like that. I think cards make you feel good, and brighten your day. (Not that you should do good things JUST to get the recognition though!)=)
I too was raised with it deeply imbedded to send thank you notes. And I do. And I get made fun of sometimes. But I also know that if I didn't, people would miss it. It is just one more nice thing I can do back. After all they did something nice for me in the first place!
I know when I do something for someone, I rarely ever get a thank you note. But I sure DO remember when I do!
I'm lousy at sending them. But I'm trying to do better... I just acquired a rubber stamp so I can make my own (not-so-cute) thank you cards. I don't get bugged when I don't get a thank-you; but I sure do feel happy if I get one. Let people mock; but your mom raised you to have class. And you do. It's the attitude of gratitude... In all things give thanks... you know? Besides, by thanking, you count your blessings, which makes you happier, I think.
Getting Thank You notes is great but I have to say I never send them. I am horrible!!! It usually comes in the form of an email!
I like to say thank you in person. I also like recieving thank you notes, but a good heart felt thank you is all I need.
I sent thank you notes out after our wedding, but for Christmas and birthdays and stuff I either thank them in person, or I call and say thank you. I never get thank you notes either, but I think sending them is a great habit to have. I know it'd make my day if someone sent one to me!!! :o)
I have been known to send thank you notes in the mail when gifts were given to me, Jeff or any of the boys. Lately, the last few birthdays, last Christmas I failed to do so. I feel bad for not doing it. The crazy thing is I wasn't taught to send them out by my parents, I just did it out of courtesy. I am working on doing it again, but only for gifts. I think it is thoughtful and I personally love getting things in the mail, even if it is only a thank you card.
I am all about thank you notes! Mostly I send them for gifts, every once in a while I send them if there was a friend we had a particularly meaningful conversation or something they helped me with...sometimes in those circumstances I send a quick email!
But truthfully here in the south, it is VERY bad manners NOT to send thank you notes. So I try to ALWAYS remember to send them! Besides who doesn't love mail?? Especially when it is NOT a bill!
I'm not as good at it as I used to be. BUt truth be told, I'm just barely starting to put my brain back together since having more than one child. I became less organized and more scattered with each child. I managed to get out Christmas cards, and celebrate my own kids' birthdays, but anything beyond that was a miracle. I think that thank you cards are sooooo important, though.
Since I am a card making I love making Thank You notes. It depends on my time.. Sometimes I send a note. Sometimes the Thank You is in person and sometime it's a phone call.. I think everyone loves to get some kind of nice note in the mail occasionally.
My goal is to send thank you notes or make phone calls. I think it is very thoughtful and I want to be a better person and send my appreciation for people's love and thoughtfulness. I don't think it matters if it is a phone call or note. Unfortunately, I'm not perfect yet at showing my appreciation, but I'm working on it!
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